"How do you deal with feeling something is wrong when everything feels right?"
— @GavinSLavelle
What is the human mind?
It is a difficult question since the only things we have to study it with are our own human minds.
When you close your eyes and try to comprehend your existence. What most people get is a combination of “This feels weird” and “This is a dumb waste of time and energy.”
So why did I just waste one minute of your time and a seat in your mental space asking that question?
Because there is no answer to this question because there is no objective human mind.
All human minds are unique in time, in space, and in relation to other human minds.
This is important to realize because I cannot actually help you in any way, shape, or form. I am entirely powerless.
Your mind will understand what it is capable of understanding regardless of what I say, or intend.
This is why giving advice you give yourself to others is usually a terrible idea because that advice is filtered around the context of your experiences which are unlikely to be the experiences of other people.
This problem in writing is that you are always writing to one person, to one imaginary mind.
However, that is where we discover the concept of mindset.
Mindsets are processes of action or movement that are transferable among most human beings. I say most because it is entirely possible that a mindset literally will not compute for some people.
These processes can be shared because they rely on things fundamental to the human experience. Here are some examples:
-Making choices
-Understanding limitations
-Learning from experience
Mindsets help you make choices, understand limitations, and learn from experience. Everyone has mindsets.
The question is does your mindset help you make good choices, does your understanding of your limitations give you more freedom or less freedom, what experiences do you choose to forget, and which do you choose to remember? How do you process your experiences?
Here is a mental exercise to attune yourself to your experiences.
All people are afraid of some choices.
All people are afraid of some limitations.
All people are afraid of some experiences.
While you are a unique person, your mindsets are likely not.
Many people before and after you will use mindsets like yours.
All people are angry about some choices.
All people are angry about some limitations.
All people are angry about some experiences.
While you are a unique person, your mindsets are likely not.
Many people before and after you will use mindsets like yours.
All people are sad about some choices.
All people are sad about some limitations.
All people are sad about some experiences.
While you are a unique person, your mindsets are likely not.
Many people before and after you will use mindsets like yours.
All people are happy about some choices.
All people are happy about some limitations.
All people are happy about some experiences.
While you are a unique person, your mindsets are likely not.
Many people before and after you will use mindsets like yours.
The philosopher Plato described discovering wisdom as emerging from a dark cave for the first time. The light is blinding and uncomfortable, however, after some time in the light, a new sense of reality is discovered. If you try to drag a group of people out of the cave they will likely resist you. However, if you go into the cave and build a trusting relationship with someone inside the cave one day they may let you guide them out of it. This is an unpleasant experience for both the teacher and the student, but there appears to be no other way to impart wisdom.
To recap:
Your mind and person are unique in time, in space, and in relation to others. Find what is bothering you and identify its emotion: happiness, sadness, anger, or fear.
Your mindsets are processes that you have developed over time from your life characteristics: choices, limitations, and experiences.
Mindsets are transferable among most human beings. Characteristics are unique to each person.
Mindsets can be categorized based on how they interact with old characteristics and create new characteristics.
The three characteristics of a mindset are choice, limitation, and experience usually accompanied by one of the four emotions: happiness, sadness, anger, or fear. Format: All people are <emotion> about some <characteristic>.
While you are a unique person, your mindsets are likely not.
Many people before and after you will use mindsets like yours.To change a mindset use a statement like this. I am a person who feels this <emotion> when I encounter this <characteristic>.
If this feels unnatural to you then it is probably outside the realm of your prior sense of identity or experience and vice versa.
If this feels natural to you then it probably fits within a network of your prior experiences.
At the end of the day, this is all just something I made up so don’t take it too seriously.
Your character which is the sum of your life characteristics is stable, and not easily changed. If a part of your character is causing you problems. A choice, a limitation, an experience, etc. you can attempt to create a new mindset.
Once a new mindset is created it can be reinforced with habits that cause it to come to mind. Ex. I am happy because I enjoyed seeing the morning sky today. I am angry because I am afraid. I am afraid because I am sad I am sad because I lost something.
So the next time someone tells you to change your mind.
Ask them if they want to give you a new mental model of reality or just a few adjustments to a process you already understand.
(I’m kidding of course. Just smile and nod. Then exit as soon as you can.)